I finally did it, yes people I deactivated every social media account I have…. except LinkedIn, o and Pinterest. I had 350 friends or so and maybe 300 or so followers on Instagram and maybe 100 followers on twitter. Pictures of their lives and “happiness” Ups downs ins and outs. Just enough information to develop your own thoughts and judgments about their lives. Well I can not spend anymore time on thoughts or judgements of anyone else’s life. It’s crazy how when you read someone’s post or see their picture all the things you think about in your mind about their life and the life you may wish you had. You have the ones that are always happy and always LIKE their husband, kids and job. Then you have the ones that love to show off any new item they have purchased or the ones that are always trying to be sexy, o and the needy ones, that have a major life crisis every week. Then you have the ones that are so religious and every post is about God. The political ones that fluids your time line with propaganda, and lets not forget the subliminal message posters.
I am social Media exhausted!!!
Back to the basics for me. If you are my friend and a part of my “real life” then you have my number and know where I live. I need to clear my mind. I need to get rid of all the distractions and stay focused on whatever it is I’m trying to do in this life I have.
7 day self challenge!!! Being stressed out to the point of no return caused me to drink a bottle of wine almost every day for 3 day straight. (I knew I just should’ve gotten some weed) My 19-year-old advised she would’ve “hooked me up” fucking kids; any who my sugar levels where off the charts so I’m sad to state I will have to differ the option of becoming a wino. I have been sugar-free for 3 days now and my levels have returned to almost normal. I have a yeast infection from hell, small price to pay for soothing my soul and easing my mental stress. I will let you know if I lose some weight and how I feel at the end of the self challenge.
I am using the site below as my guide click and check it out might find something useful.
The pursuit of happiness can be so daunting. Without self-esteem and confidence the task becomes more complex. I would like to think the way i feel about myself is…..
good, wait, not good all the time. I am comfortable in my size 14 lower body and 16-18 upper body.. ok I hate my tits, always have. But it’s what my momma gave me so I just deal with them. Anyway, when I speak of self-esteem and confidence I’m speaking mainly about my capabilities. I’ve always thought of myself as a strong person and that’s what I show the world. But in reality I have an overwhelming sense of anxiety when it comes to how people perceive me. I can say that doesn’t stop me from being me or saying what I feel, that comes naturally and often times with regret. I change my mind like the wind, I change my feelings about people and things from day-to-day and in some cases by the hour. Right now at this particular moment in time I feel like I have a thumb right on my forehead, something holding me back. Back from what! I’m not really sure I’m almost positive that its my OWN thumb planted firmly in place.
We mourn for the loved ones we lost, when in reality we are the ones left behind. All of their worries and pain have left and we still deal with them daily. I believe that in death there is nothing to fear. Life is full of fears. The uncertainty and unknown scares me everyday. Why do we take those small pockets of happiness for granted? Life is soooo temporary but we give it so little value while living.